you see this is what happens everytime:

i've got wonderful material (my little brother seeing off our wonderful friend Ana, my new wacky job, the shit that marcy keeps pulling on me at bakers, the past (chris specifically and how it's affecting me currently), and moving out/into a new place)

but i get so goddamn fucking irate that NONE of it matters. That the words just fall from my head. that no matter how much a lone time i have and spend next to a pad of paper my pen will be lost, and my words will NOT be recieved on paper.

i'm really enjoying this whole let your love dwindle thing.

Treevenge

We are all broken

I just lost my super glue.

my aunt

leaves to go back to the carribean this morning: total bummer.
i probably should have handled her visit better: staying the night with my family, eating dinner with them every night, but hey i've got bad character.

im hoping to visit her during fall break.
im hoping that soon i'll be able to be on my feet again.
im hoping to get out of this damn rut.

honestly, i'm hoping for nothing more than a decent day at work.
putting my smile on in
5..4..3..2..1..
NOW.

it's my birthday

and i'll cry if i want to.

secretregrets.com

regret:

i'll be making postsecret cards and hoping my mistake gets on secretregrets if i don't have it out with you soon. we're meant for a different kind of love and that makes me more in love with you than anything. We push this forward and we're ruined. I know you're rarely honest, and that's why I can't look you in the eye. I know that muffled sounds of one another are put to rest, and no matter how much I'd like to hold your hand I'm lying. No matter how genuine you think this is you're lying.

no regrets because i adore you. no regrets because you're supposed to be in my life. no regrets because you'll be in my life but reborn. no regrets because we're going to stop all this LYING.